Given I am not a writer, I am a blogger, do bloggers get writers block? What is it we get if we don’t get a block? Writers block just means an author loses the ability to produce new work, or experiences a creative slowdown. I have had a creative full stop. Creatively I am concerned I am all dried up! And as for new work, I have so many experiences I have not yet written about but just can’t get the pen on the page or rather the fingers on the keyboard.
What is my excuse?
I could tell you I have been swamped at work.Perhaps the excuse is, I have been planning a renovation in a strata building which is using every last one of my skills to complete. The list of requirements is long, convoluted and a pain in the damn neck. No wonder people just move.
Perhaps the lie could be to tell you we have been travelling closer to home but that of course does not mean we don’t have anything to share or talk about, because we do. So what then do I have? Do bloggers get writers block could be argued we do not considering we are not writers. We blog. We blurt out our opinions and we keep our fingers crossed that someone is following us. Writers, need followers first to be able to get published. If I can’t blog or be creative, have I perhaps lost heart? Do bloggers lose faith? Is faith the key to blogging? Is faith the key to being creative?
The wave of emotions
Let me go through the wave of emotions I have been going through lately. I have discussed previously that I have wondered if this is all worth it. This expensive hobby of mine would be great of it could pay for itself. All those trips we take could easily be justified if we got a discount or even a small amount of sharing. Is anyone actually reading me? Does anyone follow me? Do my opinions help anyone? In summary is all my effort worth anything at all.
I go back to why?
I started my blog for no reason other than I wanted a creative outlet. The creativity of writing is only one part that I have enjoyed. I love taking photos and editing them. I have surprisingly really enjoyed the technical side of creating a blog and maintaining the blog. The challenge of approaching places before we stay to try and get a discount or behind the scenes tour has been a delight for me. In questioning the madness of the maintaining this whole palaver when I receive so few comments and responses. How do I get an interactive audience? Do I want an interactive audience if the comments are negative? I am not a PR machine so how do I respond to tricking questions?
The creativity block I am having is from poor time management and lack of support at home with the children. My husband has been travelling for weeks at a time for work and will set of in a few months for another trip. I am fine but it just adds a level of pressure where I have support, so blogging gets side lined. My own role has been through waves and troughs. I work on projects and there are times when I am so busy I don’t see my kids for a week or two at a time, and then there is weeks when I am planning and coordinating various functionalities of the project and that I have time to spare.
Content, where are you?
Am I blocked with things to write about? NO. I am blocked from getting it done. Interestingly why is a question we need to ask continuously while we evolve. My why for starting a blog is not the driver anymore. I don’t want to let go of that as essentially I always want to enjoy this. Now, I want my blog to be something. I want it to answer questions. How do I compete with magazines, travel companies and all sorts of other fellow bloggers who essentially do the same thing? Many have the ability to produce way more than I do. They can commit to a story a day, months in the European sunshine and 5 different hotels in any location. How do I compete?
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After some soul searching and a trip to Bali to have some vacation time without blogging as my driving force, I have realised. It’s okay. Overnight sensations are rarely that but rather years of trying. I am a woman raising two boys. A wife supporting my husband’s career. My role that challenges me and drives me forward. the relationship most valued and inspiring is that of my devoted and kindhearted husband. Friends who are both amazingly talented friends and who motivate and encourage me. Most of all I was raised by three woman.
My paternal grandmother is my voice of kindness and appreciation for what I have not what everyone else has. How lucky am I to have the life I have and to do the things I do. She poured love into me and my siblings. She poured love into my dad and there is absolutely no way I can ever claim in my life I missed out on something. Her love for us was so endless and true for the rest of my life I will be full because of her.
My maternal grandmother was all of these things but she was such a refined and elegant woman that she has filled me with not only good manners and respect for oneself but also for appreciating the finer things in life. She never set a table without all the bells and whistles. My Nan always served things with a tray and a dish. Bless her commitment to wearing a scarf with most of her outfits. She had a wicked sense of humour and her blatant snobbery just made her all the more endearing.
My mother, I owe the most.
My mother was some of things but in a diluted amount. She came to the country to be a grazier’s wife and spent many of those first years miserable living isolated from the outside world and only her mother in law to chat to. Despite all of that has instilled strength in me. She has taught me to stand up for myself, not because she always did but possibly because she did not. I am the eldest of four and I was greatly expected to do as I was told. The rules for me were vastly different for that of my sisters.
My mother gave me a strong independence and a level of confidence that one corporate psychometric testing concluded I had ‘abnormally high’ levels of self-confidence. She taught me the importance of community and being involved, of volunteering and giving your time to help whenever you could. Something I get form her that I am sure she wasn’t expecting, was I made a decision as a teen to not live a life wasting my capabilities.
My three woman
These three woman are the reason I started this. We talk about woman can have more. Yes, they can and yes they will. None of these woman had a career outside of the war or the home. My mother gave up her nursing career to marry my father. Each generation has taken a little bit more. Travel is the only thing that has helped me to grow in the same way. When travel doesn’t work or throws you a curve ball, you certainly learn how to deal with certain issues.
We now live in an age where woman can explore what they want. I intend to show my children how work gives me so much more than all the holidays we have. I want to be able to handle situations they never could. Emotionally relate like they were not taught. To be emotionally present in a way they could not. It’s a different time, you get that right?
All the tools at our finger tips. We need to be more, in order to have more. It is now a time where we can experience parts of the world which my grandmothers could only dream of. A time where families can travel to far off places as a unit, as parts of the family and as large groups. It is a time where we can choose luxury travel or adventure travel. This is the time of opportunity for growth and development.
Soul searching complete
Soul searching done, what I want from my blog now that it has been here for some time, is this: you can dream big. You can commit to something without having to throw everything in to get there. I will always work. Continuing to put my blog aside to concentrate on things of high value to me: my husband and our relationship, my children and their emotional needs, will push me forward.
Refusing to hear that you need to be a ‘full-time’ blogger in order to be a huge success. By remaining true to myself, my ‘writers block’ will be over soon enough. Travel is my happiness. With travel I will grow. I always question and learn. I continue to accept the life I have is good. Continuing to blog and get past this ‘writers block’ or lack of creative commitment, is a goal I will achieve. ‘Be kind to yourself’, I tell myself. I can have it all, but sometimes the all has to be directed in another department for a time.
And back to faith
Lastly, continue to have faith. Without faith, what else is there? I have said it before and whilst my faith in my present direction is questioned, I know I will grow to where I need to grow to when I am ready. Our lives are made up of stories. Writing a different story to your current story is just a mind set and a commitment to change.